Saturday, March 19, 2011

Showing versus Telling

It started with The Adjustment Bureau.  And while the movie is based off a Philip K. Dick short story there were a lot of liberties taken with it (probably for the better), so the film doesn't have the same edgy and paranoid feel like some other Dick adaptations, but the movie does create an interesting perspective on love.  Most Hollywood films create a sense that love is something that hits you and no matter what happens, things will work out (see: anything by Nora Ephron) -- this is not the case in The Adjustment Bureau.  Matt Damon's character is reminded that love is something that changes people -- and instead of (SPOILER!) running for office and possibly becoming president and changing the world he would become a man who is just happy and in love -- but love is a two-way street (I cringe using that metaphor).  If Matt Damon's character were to follow off his plan and pursue Emily Blunt's character her future would be forever changed, too.  So, after the movie I started thinking about love and how most (if not all) people are incredibly selfish when it comes to love -- it's as if we rationalize that what we feel has never been felt by anyone else and will never be felt by anyone (and yes, it does feel that way) but there is the other person to consider and that the simple act of being with someone else will alter their life no matter how long two people are together.  Which brings me to my next rant (and the title of this entry).

"Stop talking about love. Every asshole in the world says he loves somebody. It means nothing. It still doesn't mean anything. What you feel only matters to you. It's what you do to the people you say you love, that's what matters. It's the only thing that counts."  I can't take credit for that quote, hence the link, but I think it makes a valid point -- people think words are all that matter, but in reality we are more the sum of out actions than the sum of our vocabulary.  People are pretty damn good at telling other people how they feel, but it's an art to show how you truly feel.

Several nights ago I was fortunate enough to have an in-depth and serious conversation with the Girlfriend about all sorts of facets of our lives that we rarely touch on or had yet to share with one another.  There were moments of laughter and some moments of revelation, but what mattered most was that I realized how much stronger our relationship became through that conversation.

The next morning I woke up with a new sense of meaning -- be what you say.  Maybe everyone else got this memo earlier in life and I was out playing hookie, but I'm glad I finally caught on.

No comments:

Post a Comment